Have you ever thought about your life as a movie? How about a sitcom?
Sometimes I honestly live a SATC life without even knowing it just without all the heels. Sometimes it's a HIMYM moment with an old group of friends. In the past I wanted to live the life of Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally. For a little while I wanted to be Amanda Peet in A Lot Like Love. I mean seriously if you had Ashton Kutcher chasing after you like that in that genuine simple way, you'd want to live in that life too. I have to say more then anything I had Love Actually moments that I longed for during the holidays. They are all symptomatic to the basic chick flick formula. People meet, there is a small conflict and then bam it works itself out with a great sentimental soundtrack and a moment of clarity and kissing at the end. Notice I did not say I wanted to live the love of The English Patient. That would be just absolute torture.
There are moments in life when one has to slow down and think about the big pictures. Yes I said pictures. Life can compartmentalize into several different bigger pictures - love, work, family, the future, the past. Sometimes it's hard to think about one without my mind drifting towards another in a delicately woven pattern. I guess that is how the whole thought process about staring in my favorite movie of the moment comes into play. As I walk through life, I have these moments that are straight out of something I could have only imagined seeing in a movie. I have my specific soundtrack. I have the wardrobe that is quintessentially me. I have the scenery and locations that paint that bigger picture. I have entertainment, heartache and triumph.
I know the spot on the street that will forever be known as the spot where I got dumped. I specifically remember the chill in the air as the rain switched to snow and the breath was taken out of my lungs as he said it's over. I recall the corner under the trees where I attempted to walk away because of an unimportant argument, and a different guy grabbed my arm only to hold me in his arms and kiss me as if it were straight out of a movie. I have a special bench in the park where it all started on a first date with coffee only to have visited it two years later for my very first kiss with that same person. Those are the public places, but sometimes it is the private spaces that make things a little worse only because you cant escape the memories. I think that the worst is laying in a bed with sheets that smell like us. Or thinking about the last time I saw his face in my house, smiling, laughing, just being. Adele made millions off of this stuff. Hollywood has got NOTHING on my own personal movie. Heartache and happiness mix in a delicate balance that is unique to me and only me.
Thinking about all of it, I cherish every stinking moment that I had good and bad. I cherish all the choices I made and the people who made them with me. They were all growing moments. I sure hope that I have many more in the future because it means I lived a full life. I enjoyed myself. I was open and vulnerable and raw and it either worked or it didn't. But I still lived through it all.
Sometimes I honestly live a SATC life without even knowing it just without all the heels. Sometimes it's a HIMYM moment with an old group of friends. In the past I wanted to live the life of Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally. For a little while I wanted to be Amanda Peet in A Lot Like Love. I mean seriously if you had Ashton Kutcher chasing after you like that in that genuine simple way, you'd want to live in that life too. I have to say more then anything I had Love Actually moments that I longed for during the holidays. They are all symptomatic to the basic chick flick formula. People meet, there is a small conflict and then bam it works itself out with a great sentimental soundtrack and a moment of clarity and kissing at the end. Notice I did not say I wanted to live the love of The English Patient. That would be just absolute torture.
There are moments in life when one has to slow down and think about the big pictures. Yes I said pictures. Life can compartmentalize into several different bigger pictures - love, work, family, the future, the past. Sometimes it's hard to think about one without my mind drifting towards another in a delicately woven pattern. I guess that is how the whole thought process about staring in my favorite movie of the moment comes into play. As I walk through life, I have these moments that are straight out of something I could have only imagined seeing in a movie. I have my specific soundtrack. I have the wardrobe that is quintessentially me. I have the scenery and locations that paint that bigger picture. I have entertainment, heartache and triumph.
I know the spot on the street that will forever be known as the spot where I got dumped. I specifically remember the chill in the air as the rain switched to snow and the breath was taken out of my lungs as he said it's over. I recall the corner under the trees where I attempted to walk away because of an unimportant argument, and a different guy grabbed my arm only to hold me in his arms and kiss me as if it were straight out of a movie. I have a special bench in the park where it all started on a first date with coffee only to have visited it two years later for my very first kiss with that same person. Those are the public places, but sometimes it is the private spaces that make things a little worse only because you cant escape the memories. I think that the worst is laying in a bed with sheets that smell like us. Or thinking about the last time I saw his face in my house, smiling, laughing, just being. Adele made millions off of this stuff. Hollywood has got NOTHING on my own personal movie. Heartache and happiness mix in a delicate balance that is unique to me and only me.
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